As a parent, it’s only natural that we want the best for our kids. We might get them into an art course, language course, or even sport course that we think could bring the best out of them. However, this should not be the case according to Ki Hadjar Dewantara, a pioneer of Indonesian education.
According to Ki Hadjar, a child will grow according to their own path. He believes that as the child grows older, they will gather enough knowledge and will show an interest in a certain subject. Once a child has reached this stage, your duty as a parent is to support your kid’s passion wholeheartedly.
This time, we will give 4 strategies that you as a parent could use to show your support for your kid’s passion, and those are:
1. Try to think outside the box
Usually, when it comes to passion, parents tend to think of enrolling their kids for enrichment classes. However, this should not be the case. Your kids might be passionate in sports, writing, reading, or even cooking. All those things can be done from your home.
Let your child discover what gives them the most fun.
2. Don’t judge!
Sometimes parents tend to judge their child’s passion. Maybe they never meant to do so, but when they did, it actually hurts the child’s self-esteem! Usually this tends to happen when the parents’ passion doesn’t line up with the child’s.
It’s very important to detach what we find fun with what our children think is fun. After all, you are 2 different human beings. If what makes your kids passionate is not fun for you, at the very least you can support your kid’s passion. The important part is that you should not antagonize them for taking a different path from you.
3. Know what interest them
Sometimes your child might also take the same interest as their peers. It might be the same sport, or art activities, or music instrument. During that time, the competition for your child to succeed is really fierce and might cause anxiety for your child in the process.
When this happens, one way you can support your kid’s passion is by taking the time to know what it is that your child is really interested in. You can observe them as they do their activities and listen to what they aspire to be regarding their passion.
4. Nurture their optimism
When it comes to competition, your child might be feeling a great amount of pressure to perform better than anyone else. However, when they fail to present their best effort, they will feel dejected. When this happens, what you can do to support your kid’s passion is by nurturing optimism in them.
Let them know that setbacks happen, and it is up to your kids to see the setbacks as a stopping point or as a stepping stone so they can do better next time.
At the end of the day, your kid’s passion might be totally different from yours. And that’s okay! You don’t need to suddenly be the best on what your kid is interested in. Sometimes, what they need isn’t an expert, because most of the time all they need is parents that support them and stand by their side.
Working while following your passion will always be an interesting topic to talk about whenever we talk about a job. But what is passion? By definition, it is a powerful or compelling emotion of feelings. It is a longing for something that you will always find enjoyable. Once people find their passion, some will pursue them wholeheartedly.
The same thing goes for kids.
With your children’s growth, they will learn new things. They will also start finding new things that will interest them but it might be unfamiliar to you. What they find interesting might change, but one particular subject will remain the same and usually, that thing is their passion.
As a parent, it is your duty to help your kids find their passion. And today, we will help you by giving some tips that could help you find your kids’ passion.
Read them stories!
Reading to your kids will always be important. However, if you read to them all the time, you might want to start seeing how they react to certain stories. You can ask them how they feel after you read them stories, and whether or not they enjoy those kind of stories. If they do, you can find stories with the same vibe and topics.
It’s not unusual for kids to find their passion through characters inside stories. You might read them a story about a crane that likes to cook, and suddenly your kid asks complex questions about cooking. Or if you read them a story about a rabbit that likes to run in a marathon, and they start asking questions about sports.
Let them feel bored
It’s not rare for us to hear how our kids complain that they feel bored. Rather than giving them something to play, it is completely normal for kids to feel bored! One study done by Sandi Mann and Rebekah Cadman concludes that boredom actually forces people to be much more creative and find ways to be entertained.
During their creative moment when they are bored, you should try to watch your kids closely. It is very possible that this boredom could be the key for them to find their passion in life. Maybe during that time, you will see them drawing, writing, or even reading books.
Take them to your workplace
If the place you work allows you to take children with you, try to schedule one day to do just that. They might not say it, but kids actually love to see what their parents do at work all day. At the office, they might not do much or they might just be sitting on your office watching you, but that’s okay!
By watching you work, they might develop the desire to do the same line of work as you do. Or, maybe they will instead realize they don’t want to do what you did. Either way, it is important to always support your kids in finding out what they are passionate about.
Sign them up for activities
One choice that might help them find what they are passionate about is sport. It doesn’t matter what they actually choose; it might be soccer, basketball, softball, dance, or even gymnastic, sign them up. Participating in sports have many benefits for the kids, and it might give them new friends that could encourage them to follow their dreams.
Or, if sports is not for them, it’s also a good idea to let your kids dip their toes into the world of art. Maybe you can let them learn how to play musical instruments, or maybe they actually enjoy writing or performing.
Share your passion
There is a possibility that your kids already know what their passion is, but simply don’t realize it. That is why sharing your passion with your kids might allow them to find out about their skills and about their interests.
After all, some passion might be born from the desire to follow in the footsteps of people your kids admire and love!
Just like how everyone is different, every child is also different. They will have their own unique taste, their own favourite sport, and most importantly is their own style to study. Once parents could figure out the study style of their children, it will be easier for those children to reach their fullest potential.
There are a total of 4 study style for your kids: Visual, Kinesthetic, Auditory, and Reading/Writing. For many children, they usually use a combination of the four. However, there will always be a certain style or combination that suits them the best.
Now, let’s try to find out which style would fit your kids!
1. Visual Learner
A visual learner child will usually excels the best when they could see images or graphs. Below are some of the signs that your child is a visual learner.
They excel at visual activities such as arts.
They enjoy books with illustrations such as pictures, encyclopedia, or even maps.
They shine the best when they are given an example for the task they are working on
They are very good at recalling animals, people, worlds, or places
They have a very keen interest in the world and the objects around them
If this is your child’s studying style, it might help to create mind maps, charts, or diagrams to help them on their study. It would also be very helpful if you help them creating study notes filled with different colors.
2. Kinesthetic Learner
Children with this study style tends to be more active, and will learn better if they can get a hands-on knowledge. To know whether or not your child is a kinesthetic learner, you can look below.
They excels at activities that need physical movement such as sports
They really enjoy hands-on activities
They can’t sit still while they were studying
They love to jump right into the task
They are very eager to do learning activities such as study games, coloring, or science experiments
If this is your child’s studying style, it would be very helpful to accommodate him by giving them practice sheets as they study. Alternatively, parents can also turn the study session into a fun game.
3. Auditory Learner
With an auditory learner, usually they do very well when knowledge is transferred verbally. Your child might be an auditory learner if they checks the signs below:
They are really capable when it comes to auditory activities like music
Before working on a task, usually they listen to the instructions carefully
During the activities, they might be asking a lot of questions
When doing schoolwork, they tend to hum, sing, or talk
They love talking with other people
Children that identifies as auditory learner would feel it helpful if parents recite their study notes loudly or if parents could help them when they struggle with a certain subject or area of study.
4. Reading/Writing Learner
Children with this study style always take notes whenever they see someone explains something. Below are some signs that might mean your child is a reading/writing learner:
They loves writing stories or reading books
They excel when they work alone without disturbance
When there is an instruction for a task, they tend to write it down
They are really good at remembering what they have read
For this type of learner, it’s best to let them write down what they have read into notes. It would also help them to create a checklist for their study.
Those are all 4 study style that children might have. It is important to note that sometimes, your child might combine a few style of learning. When that happens, parents could combine the tips of each learning style. Happy learning!
During our lifetime, we learn that there are several things that are acceptable and some that are not acceptable to say to someone. There is an unspoken rules that are taught from a young age how to behave and how to voice our opinions in various surroundings. The goal of this is to ensure we create a harmonious society and to be tolerant of others.
According to the census by BPS in 2010, Indonesia itself has more than 1.340 ethnic group scattered around all the islands, therefore the importance of tolerance is more critical than ever. We live in a world where people are coming from various backgrounds and the effect of globalisation is more apparent. If you want your kids to be a part of the global society. They will need to learn how to be tolerant of others who speak in different languages, follow different customs, and have their own religions. In order to be a respective adult in the future, it is crucial that kids learn acceptance from an early age. Areeba Hasan, a graduate of Rutgers University claims that tolerance can help your kids to be more successful and have a greater economic advantage in their adult life.
How to teach tolerance to kids?
We all know that kids will always try to mimic their parents. If you want to focus on the importance of tolerance to your kids, you can show them how you behave around people with different skin colors or people that speak different languages. It’s also a good idea to introduce your kids to a friend that has a very different heritage background.
Sometimes, it’s enough for your kids to simply learn about the beliefs, holidays, and customs of other person to foster tolerance in a home. The lack of education will usually results in stereotyping groups of individuals, and will deny the qualities that made the unique in the first place. That’s why, when a child already learned about how varying cultures, foods, people, and faiths could be, it will be easier for them to accept others when they are older.
However, if you want to teach tolerance to your kids, you should also note what you say around the kids. This is because kids tend to pick up negative phrases faster than a positive one. If they caught you talking with a negative phrases, kids will think that it’s okay to repeat those words because you used it near them.
Another important point to note is that parents should also teach their kids about self-respect. Sometimes, a child that lacks self-esteem will treat their peers badly, all because they don’t feel confident about themselves. After all, in order to respect others, it would be better if your kids could respect themselves first.
It’s important for your kids to be tolerant
According to a child advocate, Dr. Michele Borba, the importance of tolerance lies in how tolerance will lead to acceptance and understanding. However, the opposite also applies. Intolerance will bring many negative issues such as the rise of bullying in kids below 19 years of age.
Dr. Borba also explained that one of the many reasons kids would bully others is when they see someone who is too thin, overweight, speak in a different language, or has a different skin color. In short, those kids will tend to bully those different to them. If your kids have not been taught to accept other people for their unique traits, your kids will think they are different from the norm that they know.
It’s very important for kids to be taught that they cannot dictate what is normal in society. After all, everyone including themselves is unique and distinctive in one way or another. And that is also why the world is beautiful.
Teaching the importance of tolerance will be one of the biggest gifts that parents could give to their child. With tolerance, your kids will be ready to meet different people with different languages, different cultures, and different beliefs. If your kids are tolerant, the opportunity for them to thrive in the modern world of globalization will be much more secured.
One key component in becoming a good human being is tolerance. If you are tolerant, it will be easier to interact with others from different backgrounds. However, sometimes parents fail to teach tolerance to their kids, especially when they live in a community with very little diversity.
But nowadays with the issue of racism arising in many places around the world, it’s much more pressing to teach tolerance to your kids. But is it possible to “teach” them tolerance?
Of course it’s possible. That’s why this time we are going to give some pointers for you to start.
1. Learn another language
One of the “easiest” way to teach tolerance to your kids is by letting them learn another language from another culture. They need to know how the Spanish language could utilize masculine and feminine word endings, something that does not exist in Indonesian language. When someone studies language, usually they will also learn about the history and culture of that language, which is very important in learning about tolerance.
Another reason you should let your child learn another language is so they can communicate with more people. If they could communicate with other people, they will learn that other cultures might view the world differently than they do.
2. Connect with different people
Most of the time, the reason someone could be intolerant and hateful is because of fear and ignorance. And there is nothing more effective in combating ignorance than giving education inside and outside of close.
In order for your kids to not be intolerant is by letting them involved with other people. One easy way to do this is by letting their child gets involved in sports, clubs, or after school activities.
By letting your child connect with others, they will be introduced to ideas they might not have encountered before. With your child grasping the idea of connecting to other people, they will also expand their knowledge of other people’s culture.
3. Teach patience to your kids
Another reason why someone could be intolerant is their lack of patience to stop and view the world with another point of view. This is also supported by the world we live in where instantaneous communication is a key. Of course, there are certain advantages to our lifestyle at the moment, but it also rarely promotes a slow and relaxed thinking.
The best way for you as a parent could teach tolerance to your child is by letting them learn about patience. You can teach them by modeling that behavior to your children. Give you child your full attention when they talk. Let your child explain why they couldn’t immediately do what you want them to do.
4. Finding good role models and heroes
Indonesia is a country of many islands and even more cultures. In order to gain our independence, there were many heroes with different cultural background. There is Captain Pattimura from Maluku that unified kingdoms from Ternate to Tidore. There is also I Gusti Ngurah Rai from Bali. By learning about those historical figures, kids will also learn about the culture of those heroes’ hometown.
However, heroes are not the only role models kids could have. They might like a certain public figure from a different country, and that is totally okay. By having role models, usually kids will try to look for their backgrounds, and by doing so they also learn about culture from other countries.
Another easy way to teach tolerance to your kids is by reading. When someone reads a book, they will inhabit different points of view, cultures, and life experiences they would not normally encounter in their daily lives.
Keith Oatley, a professor of cognitive psychology at the University of Toronto said that reading will create a simulation of reality inside the reader’s brain. Thankfully, the brain doesn’t distinguish simulation from reality.
A particularly powerful genre kids should read, according to Oatley, is fiction. By reading fiction, the reader will have to experience the world through another person’s eyes, and that is the highest form of tolerance.
Activities to do with your kids
In order to teach tolerance to your kids, it might be a good idea to read them a few books, especially about historical figures that has to go through hardships in order to be successful. Here are some reading example that might help:
Marie Sklodowska Curie was a chemist and physicist that was born in Warsaw, Poland in 1867. Her family lost everything due to a patriotic involvement to restore Poland’s independence from Russia.
In the 1800s Poland, women are not allowed to pursue higher education, and the same thing happens to Marie. However, Marie and her sister were lucky to be involved with Flying University, an institution that allowed women to pursue a higher degree.
In 1894, Marie who was now a scientist, was denied as a professor at Krakow University because she was a woman. However, her partner convinced her to pursue a Ph.D. in Paris and Marie Curie became a leading figure in chemistry and physics eventually. Even though she was declined many things because she is a woman, she still pushes through and eventually got what she deserved in December 1903: a Nobel Prize in Physics.
If you want to tell the story of Marie Curie, there is a picture book about her that you could buy here.
Mary Teresa Bojaxhiu or better known as Mother Teresa was a religious figure revered by many. One of her greatest achievements is the founding of Missionaries of Charity, a religious congregation of Roman Catholic with over 4500 nuns.
The congregation she created manages many homes for people dying because of HIV/AIDS, tuberculosis, and leprosy. They also have soup kitchens, orphanages, schools, mobile clinics, and dispensaries.
Her legacy will surely teach your kids about empathy, tolerance, love, and charity. There is a picture book about Mother Teresa that you could get here
There are many other figures that you could read for your kids, such as: Stephen Hawking, Mozart, Shakespeare, Albert Einstein, and many more. The idea is not only to introduce them to your kids, but to also make them understand that those people are from different countries, different living conditions, and has their own hardships to overcome.
As parents, of course we would like to know what our kids are experiencing at school. However, sometimes kids don’t want to talk about their days—especially when something bad happens. Even so, knowing your kids’ day is still a very important thing to do. That is why, today we will be giving some tips on how you can talk about what happened in school with your kids.
1. Stay calm regarding tricky topics
There might be times where your kids will bring up a topic so outrageous. When they do, try to stay calm. This tricky topics can range from maybe they accidentally hurt someone, or being accidentally hurt by someone. In any case, your calmness would mean so much for them.
2. You should share something to them
If you want to talk about what happened in school with your kids, they will appreciate it if you can share what happened to you. Maybe you did something interesting in work today, or maybe talk about how school was back in your day. Once you have shared your experience, they might be interested in sharing theirs.
3. Ask open questions
When you want your kids to talk about what happened in school, try to avoid “yes or no” questions. Instead, try asking something that could trigger them to start talking. Here are some example questions you could try:
What did you do on subject x today?
Did you do any project at school today?
What did you like the most from going to school today?
Who did you spend time with during the recess time?
4. Try asking about factual things
It might be hard for your kids to answer questions that feels like it’s out of nowhere. Try talking about something your kids could actually relate to. Maybe, if you get a notice about a new kid transferring to your kids’ class you could ask about it. Or maybe, about a certain subject they were excited for.
5. Be wary of problems
If you used to have a good relationship with your kids and suddenly they don’t want to talk about their day at school, usually that could mean a bigger problem is taking place. You could either give it time, or talk to other adults that knows about your child. Try talking with their teacher or try asking a professional opinion.
Like adults, there might be time when kids don’t want to talk about what happened in school. You need to take a closer look at your kids and see when they don’t want to answer your questions. When it happens, take a step back and leave your question for another time.
You can always ask them questions, but you really should not expect them to answer all those questions in a long and detailed way. The ultimate goal is to create a connection with your kids. To let them know that you care about their day at school. That is why, if you want to talk about what happened in school with them, find some casual moments to talk such as during dinner or while you commute.
Activities to do with your kids
Talk with your kids and ask them whether or not something interesting happened at school. Try to avoid questions filled with negative emotion or yes/no questions so they could be more open with you.
Here are some examples of questions you should avoid and you should use instead.
Did something bad happen today?
I heard something happen in school today. How are you feeling? Want to share with me?
Do you have any friends in class?
Who are the kids you spend time with the most at school?
Did you get your schedule?
Could you tell me more about your schedule? What day are you excited for the most?
Was school fun?
What was your favourite part of school today?
Did x subject went well?
What part of x subject did you like the most today?
With 1340 ethnic groups, Indonesia is a country with a very rich cultural heritage. These heritages varies from dances, houses, foods, prayer, and even clothing. However, with the changing generation and advancement of technology, many kids today no longer has any idea about the importance of traditional heritage.
The many different heritage is what made Indonesia so unique, that’s why it’s important to preserve those heritages. Technology might have lessen your kids’ interest on the subject, but it doesn’t mean teaching them about heritages will always be boring.
Today, we will give you some tips so your kids can enjoy learning about Indonesian’s traditional heritage while also having fun in the process!
1. Read them Indonesian folklore stories
One of the easiest ways for your kids to learn about many cultural heritage in Indonesia is by reading them stories. Indonesia has many traditional folklore such as the legend of Surabaya, the legend of Timun Mas, to the story of Ande Ande Lumut.
If it’s hard to find the book of a certain folklore, there are now many YouTube channels that made an animation about those traditional folklore. However, you will need to accompany your kids as they watch the animation, so they can ask you if they have any questions about things they don’t understand.
2. Take them for a vacation to historical places or traditional landmarks
Another way to teach your kids about many of the traditional heritage in Indonesia is by taking them to vacation. Here are some of the most historical places in Indonesia:
Borobudur Temple is a combination of marvelous architecture science and the beauty of arts. This giant temple located on Menoreh Hills was the product of Old Mataram Kingdom that is so beautiful even UNESCO count them as a world heritage.
In Borobudur, you can see many stupas with the sculpture of Buddha inside some of them. There are also many reliefs on the walls of Borobudur, with every level tells a different narrative.
A few years ago, Lawang Sewu is known as the icon of a haunted building. There was said to be many appearances of ghastly figures on this building whose name translated into “A Thousand Doors”. However, in 2011 the restoration of Lawang Sewu finally finished, and it is now turned into a historical museum.
Lawang Sewu is actually a very historical building for the advancement of trains and locomotives in Indonesia. Built in 1904, this building became the office of Nederland-Indische Spoorweg Mattschappij or NIS for short.
Great Mosque of Demak
This mosque is one of the oldest mosques in Indonesia, which is located in Central Java. Legend said that this mosque was built by Wali Songo and Raden Patah in one night. There is no actual evidence supporting this, but there is also no evidence against it.
Great Mosque of Demak is usually used as a local pilgrimage for Muslims in Indonesia where they visit the tombs of Raden Patah and other famous Muslims figure in Indonesia. They also have a museum that opens every Saturday to Thursday from 08:00 to 16:00.
3. Enjoy dishes from various cultures
If you want your kids to be able to enjoy traditional heritage of Indonesia, nothing is more enjoyable than trying out various dishes unique to many places in the country. You don’t have to go to a certain place to enjoy their traditional dishes, you can just try finding restaurant that offers traditional cuisine around your area.
An article posted inFreely Magazine tells a story about how immigrants from around the world are still cooking their traditional dishes. This is their way to preserve their culture as they move to new places. Which means, whenever you and your kids grab a bite of a cultural dish, you are also experiencing the culture of said dishes.
There are 34 provinces in Indonesia, and almost each of them has their own traditional house. If you want to go and see those traditional houses, you don’t need to take a month of holiday in order to see them. You can simply take your kids on the weekend, because Taman Mini Indonesia Indah (TMII)can give you a taste of how rich and unique the traditional houses of each province is.
To teach about traditional heritage to many people, TMII created an area called Anjungan Daerah that has 33 traditional houses from almost every province in Indonesia. Each province has at least 3 houses that could embody the province.
Every year, usually there will be an annual traditional festival located in all around Indonesia. This festival will always be a great way for your kids to learn about the traditional heritages from many places in the country. Some of them are:
Reog Ponorogo Festival
This festival is usually held on the Muharram month in Islamic calendar. This festival is held as a part of cultural festival for the people of East Java. Held from 2004, many participants came from all across Indonesia and other countries to watch dance performance and art groups.
Dieng Culture Festival
Dieng, a place in Central Java which is also dubbed as “the country of Gods” always has their own captivating beauty. To add to that beauty, every August they always held a festival called Dieng Culture Festival. In this annual festival, visitors will be able to enjoy traditional arts, Dieng’s handmade merchandise, film festival, lampion festival, to the “Jazz di atas awan” (Jazz above the clouds) accompanied by the cold temperature of Dieng.
Erau International Folk Arts Festival
Erau is the traditional art festival in Kutai Kartanegara and one of the oldest arts festivals in Indonesia. Before 2010, this festival is always held on 29th September, along with the anniversary of Tenggarong city. However, since then the festival is carried on every July to fit with the holiday seasons.
In this festival, visitors will be able to feast their eyes with the many art and tradition tied to the Sultanate of Kutai. They will also be able to watch the traditional ceremonies of the Dayak people and a traditional sport competition.
Those are some ways for you to teach your kids about the beauty of Indonesian’s traditional heritage. There are many other ways you can teach your kids about their heritage, such as talking with your mother tongue at home. What you should remember is that you need to also make it fun and interesting for the kids, so they will want to keep learning about their heritage.
Activities to do with your kids
If it’s hard for you to take a long leave from the office, you can take your kids to one of many modern museum about Indonesian culture. The museum is called “Galeri Indonesia Kaya”, and is located in Grand Indonesia shopping mall in Central Jakarta.
They have various modern iterations of Indonesian traditional culture, such as a video mapping of Mahabarata story, multimedia maps of Indonesia that will tell about the culture of each parts of Indonesia, to the multimedia touch-screen traditional music instrument.
During your visit to the museum, you can ask your kids these following questions:
What culture do they find the most interesting?
Do they like the traditional clothes from Indonesia? If they do, which is the most appealing?
Ask them about what they feel regarding Indonesia traditional toys and/or musical instrument.
As a parent, having our child speak a foreign language will make us proud. But did you know when is the best time for kids to learn a new language?
Manyresearchers said that the sooner a child learn another language, their chance to excel at that language will also be higher. There are many different research about when a child’s ability to learn another language peaks: some say it will peak before the age of 6 or 7, and some claim that it extends until puberty. However, they all agree it will be harder for someone to learn a new language once they went through puberty.
Let your kids learn new languages before 3 to 4 years old!
Studies made byHarvard University confirmed that creativity, flexibility of the mind, and critical thinking skills of children will also be enhanced if they learn another language during this time. The same research from Harvard also claims that children have a natural ability to learn. This really helps the learning process of language, because they don’t have to master it first. They only need to know about the language, and their ability will grow as they do later in life.
Anotherstudies explain why the best time for kids to learn another language is before they reach 3 to 4 years old. They found that during that age, children will be able to adopt pronunciation and they can recreate new sounds faster. Another reason is that children’s minds aren’t filled with facts and information yet.
In a bilingual nursery school in North London called Spanish Nursery, the children there could already speak Spanish even though they haven’t gone to school yet. The director, Carmen Rampersad said that at their age, children don’t learn language; they acquire it. And for some of the kids, Spanish is not their second language. It’s either their third or fourth language.
A research by aneuroscientist in 2002 finds that the best time for kids to learn another language is when they are approaching their 3rd year. Once they reach their teenage years, it will be harder for them, because the brain will start to change.
Learn by playing?
In Moreton First Prep School, the 3 years-olds attending this school practice their English by singing and playing. Not only English, they also learn French using fun methods that are music and stories.
But that’s not all. The kids are also exposed to another foreign language: Mandarin Chinese. The school uses games and props, so that kids will not realize it that they are being exposed to another new language.
But what if my kids were late boomers?
It’s completely ok!
While the best time for kids to learn another language is when they approach their 3rd to 4th year, it doesn’t mean it’s impossible for your kids to learn another language when they reach their teenage age. However, their way of learning will be different from when they were little.
Antonella Sorace, a professor of developmental linguistics at the University of Edinburgh says that not everything goes downhill with age. One example of this is “explicit learning”, a way of learning in which a teacher explains the rules of a certain language in a classroom.
For younger kids, this is impossible because they do not have the cognitive control yet. Moreover, their attention span and memory capabilities are not yet enough for that kind of study.
If anything, a study by Israelites professors concluded that adults might be better at learning new languages, but in a way different from kids. For adults, they will use the experiences and skills they acquire as they matured, and will use that knowledge to process new information about the language.
To summarize, while the best time for kids to learn another language is when they are approaching their 3rd to 4th years, this is the time where kids are only imitating what was taught to them. Those languages they were exposed to when they were young will then be perfected during their teenage age if they study them further.
Activities to do with your kids
To help your kids learn another language, it might help to create picture cards with various languages on it. For this example, the language we will use are: English and France.
The flashcards example consists of 12 different animals (including cat and dog) so you can play with your kids. We suggest that you print the flashcards on a white cardstock, so they will have a better quality.
You can create your own flashcards and choose the language you want to teach your child.
After you got married and gave birth to an adorable child, usually your priorities will shift. You will start getting up in the middle of the night because your baby is crying. You will start taking days off from work because something happened to the little guy or girl. You will start sleeping less, and eventually you will start giving less love to your partner.
This is normal.
Unlike your child, your partner is already an adult; they can tend to themselves. You don’t need to bathe them and get them dressed. In contrast, a baby have no ability to do those things by themselves. You will have to feed your child, you will have to dry their tears, and you have to dress them up.
However, in a Journal of Family Psychology, there is a study that suggests you should not neglect giving love to your partner as you shower your kids with love. This is because children with parents that love each other will be much happier and feel more secure compared to those with parents that couldn’t love each other. By having parents that love each other, your child could have a model of what a relationship looks like.
Another journal also notes that if parents have a fight or mishandled tensions, usually those tensions will spill over into their interactions with their child. This is especially true for the fathers. The bad news is that if a child saw their parents being hostile to each other, they will start blaming themselves for the fight and their performance at school will start to decline.
Those numbers about giving more love to your partner is also supported by a survey from 2014 by the Institute for Social and Economic Research from University of Essex. The survey said that from 40.000 households in United Kingdom, most adolescents are happier when their parents love each other. That is only for kids whose parents stay together, because children with divorced parents could have a severe psychological, behavioral, and health problems.
In another survey byPew Research in 2010, 52% of young parents answered that being a good parent is “one of the most important things in life”, while 30% of them say marriage is. Which means, there are around 22% gap between the two choices.
However, giving all your love to your child is not a wise move. They will grow older, and when they become teenagers, they might meet your display of warmth with revulsion or sullenness. Grown children usually don’t want to be the object of all their parents’ affection. That is why, it’s important to divide the love you give to your child and the love to your partner.
While it’s not wrong to shower your kids with love, you shouldn’t shift all your attention there. Usually, having children is not a reason why someone would get together with their partner. Rather, having children is like a very complex puzzle that suddenly comes into your marriage life.
Don’t focus everything on your puzzle until you can no longer figure out your partner.
You can still love your child while at the same time giving the same love to your partner, and one way to do it is by raising your kids together. Spend your quality time together as you take your child on a walk. Show your affection for each other in public. And most importantly, tell your partner that you love them whole-heartedly.
As parents, we all want our children to be confident in facing all kinds of problems. But how do we nurture confidence in a kid? Confidence is something that needs to be taught to children and here’s a few tips to help you nurture confidence in your child.
1. Give them love and attention
By giving full attention to your child, you are giving a message that they are important and valuable for you. However, some people think giving attention is just listening to their child. While that is not wrong, it’s not completely right either.
In order to boost their self-worth and confidence, you can try these few tips:
When your child is talking, make sure to stop what you are doing and listen to them. It’s important for them to know that their words, opinions, thoughts, and feelings matter.
Keep your eye contact with them to make sure you listen to them.
Don’t judge them. By not judging them, you are validating their feelings and you value what they are saying.
Don’t be shy to share your own feelings to help your child expressing their own.
2. Teach them how to be resilient
One part of nurturing confidence in your child is to let them know that it’s okay to fail once a while. Children need to face setbacks, failures, criticism, and pain early on so they won’t be caught in shock when it happens later in life. Use those hurdles as an important learning experience.
What’s also important is to validate their feelings. Let them feel upset, but always be there to support them when they are ready to try another challenge in their life.
3. Show them how to love themselves
Children will usually mimic their parents. Because of that, it’s necessary to show your children that it’s okay to reward and praise yourself when you do a good job. It can be anything from creating a good piece of art, take a very good photo and win a contest, or even a job promotion.
You should celebrate those accomplishments and talk about it with your kids, while at the same time reminding your child of the skill they possess.
4. Give them responsibilities
One way of nurturing confidence in children is by giving them a work you know they can handle. It can vary from tidying up their toys, sweeping the living room, some gardening, or help you bring some bags of groceries. By letting them take responsibility, it will give them the time to know that they are needed.
5. Give them praise and encouragement
Adults are not the only one having a confidence boost when other people praise their work, but children also feel the same way. However, giving too much praise will create a pressure where they have to perform, act, or even behave flawlessly. One way to combat this is to give them encouragement.
The difference between praise and encouragement is praise rewards the result, while encouragement rewards the process. One example of encouragement is when they are in the middle of sketching an image. You can say that they are doing a great job so far.
By giving them encouragement and praise them when they did a good job, you are helping them to feel good about themselves.
6. Support their passion
As your child grows their knowledge, they will surely find something they are really interested in, and that’s great. However, sometimes you might find your children liking something you are not interested at all, and that’s okay.
As a parent, your job is to respect and encourage your child’s interest. You can start by reading up about what they like, and maybe support them in various ways. Some parents don’t realize that supporting their child’s passion means a lot for the child.
Those are a few tips you can use in nurturing confidence in your children. It might take a while for them to start believing in themselves, so it might be best if you can make them sure that you are around to help them.
Activities to do with your kids
One way to nurture confidence in your children is by giving them love and attention. The easiest way to do this is by printing out positive words to make them feel more confident in themselves. You can put those positive words inside their bag, or on their study table so they can feel more confident in themselves.
You can write the positive words yourself, or you can find some of them on the internet. Here are a few sites you can use:
Pinterest has many selection of positive words with beautiful design.
Respect is a word that has been thrown around so many times, but what does it really mean? To respect someone means you are respecting, admire, and treat that person well. You can show your respect by being nice and polite. Because of that, it’s the dream of every parent to see their child grow up as a respectful person.
There are a few things parents could do to plant the seed of respect to their kids. However, the failure to do so will instead make the child unable to show any respect towards anyone, especially their elders. Because of that, this time we will give you some tips so you can nurture the feeling of respect in your kids!
1. Give them a role model
If you want your child to grow up to be respectful, you should start with yourself. Rather than telling them to say thank you or please, let your child see you practice those values yourself. If they see you always doing that, they will start to think that it’s a normal thing to do and will start doing it before you realize.
2. Include them in the conversation
Every time you talk about your children near them, make sure to include them inside the actual conversation. If you want to talk about how your child wins a competition, try asking them about their competition instead of telling it yourself.
Your child might want you to talk about it on their behalf, but it’s always good to offer them the chance to speak up.
3. Don’t demand apology from them
Sometimes, your child might do something that will cause harm to you. Maybe, you made a cup of hot coffee, and they were running and bumped into you until you fell down.
When those things happen, it’s easy to just blame them and ask for their apologies. However, children actually lose a little dignity when they make mistakes. If you want your child to grow up respectful, you should instead help your child to find a way to solve that problem.
If you want your kids to say they are sorry, the best way to teach them is by modeling it to them. Demonstrate that it’s okay to admit you did something wrong by apologizing.
4. Never force them to share
While it’s every parents’ dream that they child would be able to share what they have with other kids, it’s unrealistic. All you can do is to do model sharing as much as you can and support your child when they want to try it out. They should learn on their timeframe that sharing can reward social experience.
5. Never force them to show affection
When you take your kids to the big family, never suggest your child to give their aunt or grandma a kiss or hug since it probably will make them feel awkward and uncomfortable. Instead, try to suggest their aunt or grandma to offer it instead.
During your interaction with your kids, you might want to ask yourself whether what you are going to do to them will strengthen or weaken your relationship. Sometimes, it might be hard to do so but you can try to picture yourself on your child’s position. Would you like it if your parents do that to you? There are many lists of do’s and don’ts when it comes to nurturing your child, sometimes you need to do a trial and error.
At the end of the day, if you want your child to grow to be respectful, you need to start with your connection with them. You need to be respectful to them first, even though they are far younger than you, and even though they are your child. Because, if you as a parent can’t give them a proper role model, where else can they learn it from?
In communicating, many people think that the only way to do it is verbally. However, this is not true. According to Gary Chapman, Ph.D., a marriage counselor, he theorized that there are 5 ways of love language that a person can experience, and this is also true for kids. Dr. Chapman says that if parents could decode their children’s love language, it would make a big difference in their relationship.
For that reason, this time we will give some tips to decode a child’s love language down below.
1. Quality time
Some kids’ feel that they are valued the most when their parents choose to spend time with them. Usually, children with this type of love language would say things like “Dad, see this!” or “Mom, come to my room!”
If your kids are the type to do this, the best way to express your love to them is by giving them your undivided attention. It is okay for that time to be short, but you need to let your kids choose the activity. It doesn’t have to be a play, sometimes it can be as simple as wanting you to read books for them.
If this is the language of love your child prefer, never punish them by isolating them in your room, because that would make them feel really unwanted.
2. Physical touch
There are some children that prefer the love language of physical touch as a way to get affection from you. It’s not hard to identify this type of children because they would usually be in your space or play with your hand, body, or legs. That is a signal that they want you to hug them or pat their head more.
For this type of kids, you can express your love by asking whether or not your child wants to sit on your lap, or offer them to hold hands when you walk together. Another good idea is to play wrestle. You can also express it by simply giving them kisses.
However, you need to be careful not to slap or spank children with this type of love language because they will find it really devastating.
Children with gifts as their primary love language would really appreciate being given presents when they don’t ask for it. While everyone loves to be given presents, children with this language of love will act differently. For them, gifts are an extension of their parents and their parents’ love.
However, Dr. Chapman also notes that parents need to be careful with gifts so they won’t overdoing the gift giving. It is important to remember that parents need to give their children gifts that will be helpful for them, not only what their child wants.
4. Acts of service
This language of love are sometimes mistaken as a selfish request. Children that speak this language of love usually really appreciate thoughtful gestures such as cooking them their favourite meal, or they might ask their parents to fix tie their shoes.
Dr. Chapman says that parents don’t have to exactly fulfill every request made by their child. This is because sometimes when parents tend to go overboard, it might make the children becoming too reliant on them.
5. Loving words
If your child loves to give you sweet feedback and praises, it might be because this is their love language. Usually, this type of kid will beams when their parents give praises.
A good way to surprise this type of child with your love is to give them little notes on their lunch, encouraging text, and the most important thing is to verbally express how much you love them.
However, be mindful of how you phrase your love. Make sure you say your love without exception (“I love you, but only when you…”) because that will imply your love for them is very conditional.
To add, Dr. Chapman believes that these love languages acts like personality traits and will stay with your child for life. It’s not strange to see your child’s preference change from stage to stage, so parents need to really notice how their child behaves.
Here’s the link to a short quiz created by Dr. Chapman to find out what is the love language of your children. Happy loving!